mommapalooza

three going on thirteen

A couple of days ago, I sat down for a twenty-minute chat with Madeline's preschool teacher. It was the second parent-teacher interview that I've been to, and it was a treat to learn about what Madeline enjoys participating in, what her class has been doing, and how she's coming along with social skills. Madeline is usually more interested in talking about what I've made for lunch at home than what she did at school that morning, you see! At the very end of the interview, her teacher brought up an issue that she said she was going to discuss with all of the parents of the little girls in her class.

And what was the issue that was infiltrating the clutch of little three and four year-old girls? Well, they've started to go up to each other and say "I'm not your friend today. I'm only <insert name of schoolmate here>'s friend!" and "You can't sit here! Only <insert name of schoolmate> can sit by me!"

I don't know how big a deal to make out of this, and I'm not sure that Madeline's teacher does, either. Sometime, on the car ride home from preschool, she'd announce, "I was not friends with <insert name of school chum here> today. She played with <insert name>" and I began to wonder how a three year-old girl defines friendship. Is it an enduring thing, or does it exist very much in-the-moment? Is it mutually-exclusive, were A can't be friends with B if B is friends with C?  And are all friendships restored the next day at school after everyone has had a good night's sleep?

It makes me really sad that these lovely little girls in Madeline's class are talking to each other like that. It's a little ... junior high, no?

Quotable Madeline: On Gardening

Last night, Madeline was using a brand-new bar of homemade soap to wash the layers of school yard sand off of her. "Look Mama! It has nuts in it!" she exclaimed, showing me the bar of soap.

"Actually, those are poppy seeds," I gently corrected, indicating the little black specks that were interspersed with oatmeal flakes in the bar.

Madeline's excited response: "Seeds? Then we can plant them and grow more soap!"

moving on

Slowly, over the last week, I've been moving all of Madeline's personal effects from her bedroom into the room that she prefers to sleep in. I have just one more framed photograph to hang up. I feel rather sad about doing all of this.

When our container of furniture arrived in BKK after making it's journey from Canada, the first thing that I wanted to do was set up a cute little bedroom for Madeline. It really bothered me, when we were living in our rental house in St. John's, that Madeline's room was so lifeless. All beige and dark furniture. Her room in Calgary was very cheery, and I wanted to have as happy a space here in Bangkok to play and sleep in. I was mentally decorating Madeline's room here even before we arrived. Our container arrived with the colourful sheets for her new bed, the fun pictures for hanging on her bedroom walls, and a menagerie of furniture and toys.  We were able to give her a large and bright room, with lots of wall space for artwork and a huge bathroom - so roomy that we could fit in there together!

All was good for about two months, until Madeline started to talk about scary noises that she heard in her bedroom. I don't know ... The only weird noise I ever heard was something that sounds like a washing machine that our upstairs neighbours seem to like to use at 6 am.  It didn't matter, though. When Madeline realized that her old crib was sitting in the room next door to hers, she couldn't move in fast enough.

I was convinced that it was merely a phase, and she'd be back in her bed and her bedroom in a week or so, after the novelty had worn off. After all, that room was smaller, and it's bathroom was not very conveniently laid-out for the newly potty-trained.  I thought these things were important.

It's been four months now, and last week, when I asked Madeline if she wanted to move back into her bedroom, she told me "No, it's too scary!" So, I've been moving her clothes between the closets and hanging up her pictures on the walls of her new room. And yes, I'm sad to starting over again, but I know that it's right thing to do as Madeline deserves to have somewhere to sleep and play where she feels safe. On the plus side, her new room is the coolest in the house - it only has one outside wall. We'll just keep her things in the roomy bathroom next-door, though :)

the princess diaries

I've realized, in my adulthood, that I am an anti-commercial princess person. Completely against marketing princess stuff to young children. It's never about how princesses in real-life go to school or work hard for non-profit organizations. Real princesses don't wear their crowns and ball gowns every day, and it's hard to convince my kiddo of that because Disney says otherwise.

But I can remember what it was like to be a three year old little girl, so I also feel that I ought to be a little forgiving with my own three year old little girl. This past fall, when I saw on Blogher that Disney was offering a complimentary copy of the Princess Enchanted Tales: Follow Your Dream DVD in exchange for a review, I signed up. And then I waited for the DVD to arrive in the mail. And waited. And waited some more. Shrugged my shoulders as the disc would be arriving in Bangkok via our American forwarding address, so it would naturally take longer. And then I waited some more. I emailed Blogher to ask if I was supposed to have actually received an actual DVD. No response. Tapped my feet a little. Then, a week before Christmas, it arrived.

Naturally, I did what any other logical parent would do in such a situation - I wrapped it up and stuck it in Madeline's stocking! 

It was the only DVD that Madeline cared to watch when we were on our London holiday, despite the fact that I packed some totally awesome family films like Curious George and Cars. My little three year-old adores it with all of her little heart, and I guess that I'd have to give it a thumbs-up as well, as much as that means from me. I would much rather that she watch the two age-appropriate stories about Aurora and Jasmine taking responsibility and being helpful towards others than a Disney feature about pining away for a prince (ie. Cinderella) or waiting to be rescued by a prince (ie. The Sleeping Beauty and Snow White), or has content that frightens her (ie. Snow White, Aladdin, and Mulan).  I'm pleasantly surprised that the Disney princesses of Madeline's childhood are a little more well-rounded and multi-dimensional than they were back in my day. 

If only they could wear shorts or jeans in their next DVDs :)

london calling

Dear Madeline,

Your dad and I are quite happy that you had fun on our winter holiday in London. I have some fabulous memories of you chatting with the hotel staff, being brave with the best Father Christmas ever at Harrod's, sitting like a grown-up on the Underground, and excitedly  applauding at the end of the Christmas pantomime we went to see.

My grievance is with the souvenir that you brought home with you - time zone confusion. The nights where you don't fall asleep until four in morning are excruciating to your dad and I. We realize that four in the morning here occurs at a perfectly acceptable bedtime in the UK, but have I mentioned that it's FOUR IN THE MORNING here in Bangkok? Your dad has to leave for work a mere two-and-a-half hours later!

What I don't understand is why you're perfectly happy to follow your usual bedtime routine at 7:30 in the evening. You have a bath, brush your teeth, get into your jammies, and then we read your bedtime stories. And you do fall asleep, for an hour or two. A nap, I guess you'd say ...

Anyway, I'm sure that I've mentioned all of this to you, groggily and not nearly as cordially, in the wee hours of the morning, but I thought that I might get quicker corrective action if I put it in writing. Please, please, please, no more sleepless nights!

Love,

Your Mom (who falls behind in everything when she falls behind in sleep)

Interview: Three Years, Six Months

Madeline, what's your favourite colour?: Pink! And purple!

What is your favourite film?: Backyardigans. The mermaid one.

What is your favourite book?: Gruffalo!

What is your favourite thing to eat?: Broccoli! (editorial note: Is she serious???)

What is your favourite thing to play with?: My big and little turtles!

What is your favourite thing about preschool?: Going outside to play with the slide and treehouse!